Simply the Best!

Welcome to the crazy house! With a hubby and three kids to get out to school in the mornings, it truly is a crazy house. I laugh that most morning are like this." Mom, do I look good"? Is always asked. Or" mom, can you sign this".? That's the dreaded one! Because someone didn't do a good job on a paper. They always bring it to me when I am  half dead from sleep and to blind to see it! I  will sign my life away!!  Hubby was chatting me from the shower. The kids all hollering "bye". Me saying "love you", "have a great day" . Just a normal morning. But different!
  No one really wanted to wake up. Its Friday! We all wanted to sleep in. In fact its a three day weekend for us! PARRRTTTTY! Of course everyone finally rallied and out the door they went. Last to leave is my darling hubby. Who on Friday gets to wear jeans. So it's always a good day on Friday for him. As he stoops to kiss me, yes stoops , he's 9 inches taller then me!! He says .. that I am "simply the best"! Of course being raised in the 90's I broke out into singing Tina Turner's version Simply the Best. Head shake and all.( Sounded good too) Made my morning to think he thinks I am the best.. Tell someone today that they are the best! Make someone's day. It's Friday . It will kick start your weekend and theirs! To all our readers, you are the best!

Tonight is Gamecock Football Night!

Daddy & Daughter Football Night

Donald is a HUGE Gamecock fan. The one surefire way to show him that I love him and he is special to me is to fix "man food" on football night. Tonight is one such night. The Gamecocks kick off at 6pm (this was our morning conversation as he was getting ready for work) and he will be home at 7:30. I have planned homemade sloppy joes and chips for dinner. He is so excited about our plans and I could see it and hear it in his voice as he was getting ready for the day. It made my heart happy that I could do something special for him. Now I am not a football fan in any sense of the word, this is something special just for him. So I will snuggle up on the couch with my kindle amidst the yelling and cheering from my husband and enjoy my book. He loves just having me nearby, being able to share his teams gains and losses with me. From time to time I will drift from the room to check facebook or to prepare my grocery list, but I will return to hear an update or to just talk.

When we were first married I would bow out of these games. I wasn't interested and why should I take the time to sit through a game? The answer is simple, because they are important to my husband. It brings us closer and it shows him love. This one small act has brought us closer than I could have ever imagined.

Philippians 4:13  I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.

Expect Change and Share

Boo Boo Kitty

Addy and one of her girls.

If there is one thing my Donald has come to realize our marriage gives an abundance of, it is change. I am adventurous, I think of life as one big experiment. Things should be shaken up often. Case in point, 2 days ago Donald came home to two new pets. We lost our hamster Nina and a friend offered us their two guinea pigs (Addy and Ava), I took her up on the offer. However I forgot to mention this to Donald, I truly didn't realize that I had not mentioned this to him until that night, about 10 mins before he was due home. So in he comes from work and there to greet him are a chirping Addy and Ava (guinea pigs chirp, so cute). He just chuckles then comes to find me to hear the tale of how they came to join our family. He could have gotten upset, fussed and yelled. Instead he chooses to love ME. All of me, even the crazy quirks that I have like owning a small petting zoo in a house with 5 kiddos. Does it sometimes get old? I am sure it does, does he get frustrated most definitely. But somehow he always seems to love me unconditionally and find the silver lining. I think this is the very essence of marriage.

Nina

Sophie Ariel

We walk into marriage with the idea that it is about our dreams and goals. That our spouses are just supposed to get on board and make us happy and fulfill our every want or need. This couldn't be further from the truth. Marriage is a journey that two people take together, and in the course of this journey they come to know one another and hopefully grow to respect each other. Remember in Kindergarten the lessons on sharing, they come in handy here. We have to share this journey with our spouse. Incorporate their dreams and goals into our to do lists. So my advice for today is expect change and differences to come up. Ask Our Heavenly Father to give you a longsuffering spirit toward your spouse as you grow together and get to know one another better. Look for reasons to love your spouse and to continue in the journey you two are on.

 John 13:34 - A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.

Keep Smiling

                                        

I was 18 when I married my husband. Fresh out of high school, thought I knew it all. He, a graduate of college already and a military man. He was seasoned , more stern. Over our 18 years of marriage I  can say I know one thing that has helped us. My smile.
My smile can brighten his day. Your smile can brighten your spouse's day! It can make your man want to go to work. It can make him want to come home again.( Who wants a sour puss for a wife? )
 Your smile is contagious. It can change the attitude of the most bitter of folks. A smile lets people know there is hope. Joy is to be had one more time. Its a reminder that life is good! Your smile will let him know he makes you happy . Smile, keep smiling, the whole world really will smile with you. :)
 

Frugal Date Night Ideas

Keeping the majority of your date nights on the frugal side will allow you to do more for your marriage on a more regular basis. We try to have date night once a week. Only one date night a month is a BIG night like Movie and Dinner out. The rest of the time we get creative!

1. Enjoy Ice Cream Floats while watching the sunset.
2. Breakfast in bed after the kids are in school. (We love this one since Donald works shift work) It is a great time to talk and reconnect.
3. A romantic stroll around town.
4. Have a dvd player in the van? Put it to good use with a Redbox or Netflix Rental. A little smooching wouldn't hurt either. ;-)
5.Candle lit dinner on your best dishes, light a few candles and put on a romantic play list.
6. Go to the park and swing, tap into your carefree side.
7. Plan a camping trip with your love. We have yet to do this but it is high on our list of to dos.
8. Plan a themed movie night around your love's fave movie. Guys especially get a big kick out of this.
9. Late night swim at a local water hole. Hey the movies always make this seem so romantic, go for it!
10. Karaoke the night away. Donald loves karaoke and it is the perfect way to either be silly together or compete in some good natured fun.

Please feel free to comment and share your favorite frugal date night idea. We love hearing from you!

Zebra Carpet

About two years after we built onto our house I decided to steam clean our rugs. In all my other rooms I used a bleach solution, we have white carpets.(Never again by the way will I ever have white carpets) . I forgot and just sped through to my next room  trying to hurry before my youngsters got home from school. Within minutes it dawned on me what I had done. My forest green , frieze carpet, that was only two years old was now stripped yellow. I had done it! I had invented a new kind of carpeting. green and yellow zebra print!! My husband was going to kill me.
   I feared the unknown. I called grandma ,who is my super hero and can normally fix about anything. She was no help. I got on Facebook. I asked all my friends. I called carpet store after carpet store asking for advice. My time was ticking away. My husband would be home in T-minus  34 minutes 6 seconds. He was going to murder me on the rug that I had just ruined!
    I made it super dark in the house that night. I prayed he wouldn't see my big mistake. He praised me for the other rooms, saying it looked so nice and smelled so good.. Lord, knows he had not seen my true work of art in the very next room.
On Saturday after our morning run to all the yard sales . He comes in and opens the curtains to the living room.  Only to see my zebra print art project, with a smirk on his face, He asks if I might have gotten a little carried away with my cleaning. I felt like digging my own hole to climb in. As I agreed. His forgiveness or lack of madness that day was a moment to remember. I had built up in my mind he was going to be angry and pitch a fit. But, in turn he said if we can fix it lets try. If not ,only our friends will see. 
    Its the little things in a relationship that help them to grow. Being kind and forgiving is the key to a life filled with love.My green and yellow carpet still remains. Only I could be so silly. Only he could love me no matter what!

 Hebrews 10:17  And their sins and iniquities will I remember no more

Something Special

Tonight is midweek for Donald. He works 12 hour shifts and we get very little time together. So tonight the kiddos will go to bed early so we can have a quiet dinner together and have a chance to reconnect. I will set the table with pretty dishes and add a little candle light, makes a simple midweek meal special and it lets my sweetie know I look forward to our time together. What is something special you could do for your sweetie?

Wrong side of the Bed

Do you ever just have one of those days when you wake up on the wrong side of the bed? Lord, knows I do. We all have days of fatigue and despair. Today was my bad day! The dog kept barking at 3 am to go out. Then the first batch of school alarms sound  in my ear. Then at 6 am the last alarm goes off. I had only been asleep maybe a whole 4 minutes. By the time all the knocking and banging stops and  I get my last  morning kiss goodbye, it's like a shot in the eyeball. (with my bad breathe and all). I felt like I had been ran over with a bus , and the bus was still parked on top of me.

  Good bye, see ya later, Don't let the door hit ya in the behind, kinda morning. Leave me A L O N E! That's what I was thinking...
    Then I got back in bed.... I could still smell the lingering hint of my husband's cologne. I could still feel the warmth of his body that he had left behind. Wait a minute! I am alone. I want that 5 second kiss back. I want that embrace back. I take back what I thought..
 As I slip farther down under the sheets I think about all the wonderful memories we have made in that bed over the last 18 years. How we made 3 babies there. I smile to myself ... roll over ...and get out on his side of the bed. Time to take that dog out again!

It's a new week!

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. ~Philippians 4:8

Let's put God first in our marriages this week. Look for the good in your spouse and build them up in the Lord! I would love to hear how this strengthens your marriage and brings you closer to your sweetie!

Yetta's Boxes of Deliciousness

During our first year of marriage we lived in an apartment ,next door to an elderly lady named Yetta. She was a colorful lady to say the least. Full of tales from her home in Louisiana. Yetta, loved to cook . She had boxes and boxes full of recipe books. You could barely walk into her house without tripping over a "box of deliciousness" she'd say.
 Yetta died one Saturday evening. I had never met any of her children until that day. As we were talking, her children asked me about all of the boxes. I said that she called them her "boxes of deliciousness" . They were boxes full of recipe books. Her children looked at me bewildered, as she didn't know how to read. Yetta, had never followed a recipe. Then I realized that Yetta, knew I loved to cook. It was something we shared. I was 18 she was 77, cooking brought us together. Yetta, wanted a friend with her children far away. She was lonely.
 Intimacy with our spouse is like this often times. We want someone to share with. Sometimes we can be in the same room with our spouse and still be lonely. And it is in this moment we must bridge whatever gap exists and reach out to our spouse. Most of us just want someone to listen to us. Share our comings and goings with. Someone to enjoy a hobby with. Yetta, knew I liked to cook ,so she made it so I had all the recipes I could ever want in front of me. If I was over , I was listening to her. Most of the time our spouses are the same way. They want our ear to listen . Someone to take time to talk to them. Encourage them .  Good food doesn't hurt either of course.
  Some of those recipes took a lot of time to prepare. I had to look for all the ingredients. Like marriage it takes work. Time to grow, but in the end you have baked yourself up a delicious life, full of LOVE.  Thank you Yetta,True friends never see age. Thank you to my husband for always listening to me through the years.


O taste and see that the LORD is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in him. Psalm 34:8

For Better or Worse

As he says "Are you ready to go" for the 100th time today, she smiles gently and says,"yes Papa".  Papa being her husbands nickname. She ushers him out apologizing. saying it is only getting worse.
My father in law was diagnosed with Alzheimer's Disease a few years ago. This year has been the most noticeable to us. He is quick to anger and fast to forget, so unlike the man we knew before. But, he is still Papa. Papa is just different. My children don't understand . They think he doesn't like them, or that they get on his nerves. Papa loves mom. You can tell, he still kisses her after every meal. Thanking her for making it. He prays over our meals like normal thanking God for the day, our churches, and missionaries. Papa is sick, he wont get any better. We have to remember the good times with him, like one night they were over and he asked to listen to Polka music. He grabbed up my mother in law and danced her around my dining room. I will never forget that night. Every day my mother in law wakes up to a new challenge fearing he may not remember her, or be able to tell her he loves her after 50 years.
As she said tonight, while heading out my door, with papa on her trail. For better or worse!
  We must remember that we said it, did you mean it? I did. For better or worse . I said my vow to God and to my husband, enjoy the time you have with the man God gave you. For better or worse...

Mending the holes in our marriage.

So how do we mend the holes we find in our marriage? First don't let them get too big. Mend them when they are tiny, before resentment sets down deep roots. Communication is key. However sometimes emotions are raw and we find that communication is difficult or impossible. In this case start small, find some gesture that will show your spouse that you love them even in difficulty and you want to be a blessing to them. This could be as simple as slipping a love note along with their favorite candy into their lunch for them to discover later on. Or maybe rent their favorite movie or a new release they have been wanting to see and fix some snacks and just enjoy being together. Our time together doesn't have to be extravagant or expensive. In fact it is in doing the simple things that will allow us to make time for our spouses daily and in any circumstance.

Pray beforehand for God to open both of your hearts to healing. Our heavenly father created both of you and He knows what you each need to make it through these hurdles and it is His will for our marriages to be healthy and thriving. He is worthy of our trust. Remember that you are not responsible for how your spouse acts, but you are responsible for your actions. Honor Christ even when it is hard.

And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken. Ecclesiastes 4:12

One holey pair of drawers.

We are a frugal family, my hubby is great with numbers and money and this has been reflected on me and the management of our home. So I was taking my hubby's drawers to grandma to have them mended. Well, one day the inevitable happened, there was no mend left in those drawers (yes I am a Southern Belle), her words were "They are so threadbare I am gonna have to spin cotton and make new thread to fix these holes". 

Our marriages can get that way if not properly cared for. Life tears holes, beats us down until there isn't much left at all. We too can beat each other down and tear holes until there isn't much left at all. And often times we turn on each other and do fatal damage to the one thing we should cherish the most, our marriage. Before we get to the point where we are damaging our marriage we should stop, and get creative and re-establish why we are together, what we love about each other,  spin new cotton for ourselves and our spouse. Remembering the sweet times in our relationship can mend those holes and can help us reconnect with each other. We don't want to just throw out the useful fabric when work needs to be done, we want to find the beauty in what we have built with our spouses, and make things stronger. Marriage is a continual work in progress.

l Peter 4:8 - And above all things have fervent charity (love) among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins.