Stay off the rabbit trails.

Let us stop and take a closer look at this business of being remade by God. Our stubbornness can get in the way. I know this all too well. In 2000 my first marriage came to an end after a little over 3 years. As a couple we were a disaster. Why? Selfishness and stubbornness, plain and simple. I wanted my way and he wanted his way and neither of us thought to get out of God's way and seek HIS will, until it was too late, at least in our fleshly eyes it was too late.

My ex filed for divorce and I was served the papers at work. I remember vividly coming home after leaving work early. I got to my apartment, opened the front door and walked in, collapsed on the floor and just sobbed. As a christian I knew what God felt about us being divorced. I had done every thing that I knew would honor God as far as waiting until I was married to be intimate, I was a faithful wife. In fact I had never even dated or kissed another man, this shouldn't be happening. Then God gently reminded me that I knew that marrying this man had been wrong. We didn't share the same belief system. There were caution signs evident all through our relationship before we married. God had simply stepped back and allowed me to do what I thought was best. How wrong I had been. I didn't want this blemish on my record for all time, I wanted my marriage back and I wanted God to heal it. Was that so hard? It wasn't too hard for God but God doesn't force himself on us. If we choose divorce then He steps back and allows it. I had chosen to enter into a marriage that I knew was not honoring to God, I was paying the consequences of my own actions.

Let me stop here and say that even as a divorced woman I do not agree that we should view our marriages as temporary. We shouldn't look for an out when things get tough, we should look to God. Our broken marriage was not what my ex-wanted nor did I want it in it's current state. The problems we faced were HUGE and seemed humanly insurmountable. However this did not take God by surprise and He had a plan in place for my life. What I rest in, is the fact that I prayed daily for God to restore what we had broken, while waiting for those divorce papers. I should have continued looking to God even when the answer was no, the marriage was over. However I decided to turn my back on God for almost 3 years. When I look back on that time I wish things were different. God did not deserve my silence and disobedience. This was not His fault and I realize that I lost valuable time that could have been spent at the feet of my Savior and Lord, growing, learning and serving. Before my divorce I looked at my marriage as the path I was on. After and in my marriage with Donald I realize the view is broader. The Path I am traveling is one of service to my King Jesus, Donald is the only person I want to travel this path with, to be successful we both have to stay focused on the goal and not get sidetracked by other things that do not matter. In Christ, we are more than enough for each other if we keep things in the proper perspective.

Proverbs 4:25 ESV  Let your eyes look directly forward, and your gaze be straight before you.